I hope your day is going well. I’m listening to the garbage and recycling trucks driving by as I type. When my son was around two, we had to go outside and see the trucks every garbage day. If we were out for a trike ride during the weekly collection and saw one of the trucks, we’d follow it around the neighborhood. The drivers got to know us. My son still loves trucks today.
Anyway, onto today’s topic. I’ve been thinking about how it can feel when we start working on changing something in our life — it can sometimes make the things we had been doing feel really uncomfortable, or it can have us starting to wonder about the people we hang out with (sometimes the relationships don’t feel so great anymore and hell, that can feel scary).
I remember when I was starting to change what I ate, and there were some groups that it began to be really hard to hang around. I liked the people, yet I knew the environment didn’t serve me on the food end. It was too easy for me to say “what the hell — I’ll eat that too” even though I knew I’d regret it later once the stomachache, headache, and irritability set in. Sometimes I’d feel angry at those in the group because I didn’t agree with their choices and it all felt so hard to deal with!! Other times I felt angry with myself, guilty for judging their choices. I felt so uncomfortable and just wanted things to be easy and feel good — and it didn’t feel at all like that.
Things did work out (as they always do). In some cases, I saw I needed to cut back or end a relationship if it wasn’t serving me (I’m learning that feeling resentful in a relationship is a recipe for disaster). This was hard, but not making a decision and staying in was harder. So the decision needs to be made.
It also became (and continues to become) clearer that we’re all doing the best we can in any situation, and that I can never know anyone else’s full story or experience (nor is it my place to know). Slowly, oh so slowly, I’m reminding myself that I have a choice when judgment pops up — I can acknowledge and work on releasing it or choose to push the energy onto another. If I listen to myself, I always know what will best serve, even if I don’t like it in the moment. (And yes, this practice is WAY easier said then done; I’d bet I’ll be working on it for the rest of my life.)
I’d love to hear your thoughts. Anything you’re working on that is making the day-to-day uncomfortable? Any favorite tips for dealing with the discomfort? Please leave a comment below. 🙂